Kelly Heath

The Surrendered Life

Connect With Your Kids, Family, Parenting ·

Be the First to Say You’re Sorry (7 Ways to Connect with Your Teen: Part 6)

It happens to all of us. We are in the middle of what we think is a perfectly normal conversation with our teen, when suddenly voices get louder, tears fall, and all you-know-what breaks loose!

Or maybe we make a promise with every intention of fulfilling it; only, we forget to check our schedule first or something important pops up. We try to explain or justify our predicament, but our words ring hollow to the disappointed ears of our teen.

Sooner or later, we all find ourselves in conflict of some sort with our teenagers, wondering who will be the first to say sorry. Can I give you some advice?

Most of the time, it should be you.

Wait, what?…

Connect With Your Kids, Family, Uncategorized ·

7 Ways to Connect With Your Teen (Part 2: Time)

This seems obvious, I know. It’s hard to connect with someone if you don’t make time for them, right? Yet, how often do we miss this? When our kids are younger, we naturally spend a lot of time with them because they need us for everything. But as they get older, they become less dependent. They begin to spend more and more time away from us.

If we truly want to connect with our teen, we must be intentional about spending time with them.

Connect With Your Kids ·

7 Ways to Connect with Your Teen (Part 1: Pray)

The “teen years” can be difficult. Relating with our teens on a deep level can be even more difficult. But I believe being intentional about connecting with our teens is the best investment we can make!

While there is no formula for perfect parenting, I want to share 7 practical ways you can connect with your teen. For the next seven weeks, we will talk about each of these areas in more detail and how they can positively influence our relationship with our teens.

Let’s start with PRAYER…

Faith, Family, Motherhood, Transformation, Uncategorized ·

Change How You Parent: Fear or Faith?

It is really hard to watch our kids walking that line between right and wrong, tip-toeing as close as they can to the dark without actually falling in. Jeff and I have encountered these types of struggles on multiple occasions with our children, so I feel your pain.
Jeff is better about seeing the big picture, but if I’m honest with you, I pretty much tend to freak out. I’m afraid they are going to ruin their life. I’m afraid they are going to walk away from Jesus. I’m afraid they are going to become everything I have invested so much time and energy guarding against!
I’m just plain afraid. And I begin to parent out of fear…

Faith, Family ·

How to Talk to Your Kids About the Election

As easy as it is, it’s not enough to complain to our children about politics. No, HOW we talk about the election with our kids matters. This is one of those times I am reminding myself I have the opportunity to look at things from a different perspective and use the current situation to create constructive conversation. Here are some revised talking points I came up with…

Faith, Manna, Uncategorized ·

The Freedom of Self-Denial

“Mom, are you serious?? What is wrong with you? No one else in the world has stupid rules like this. I hate it! You’re ruining my life! You and dad are the worst!”

I sat there suppressing a smile and polishing my Mother of the Year trophy while the child-who-shall-not-be-named stomped out of the room.

Sorry, kid, this isn’t our first rodeo.

In case you’re wondering about the preposterous rule, Jeff and I recently implemented a “No technology during the school week” policy. You can imagine how well that went over.

Y’all, sometimes parenting is really hard. Okay, most of the time, parenting is really hard! Making our kids mad at us is no fun. Setting limits and boundaries we know they won’t like is terribly difficult. Listening to them tell us that we are ruining their life (and wondering if it’s true) is heart-wrenching.

But sometimes a mom (or dad) has to do what a mom (or dad) has to do…

Family ·

Parenting Teens in a Virtual World (Part 2): Guidelines for Staying Safe, Steady, and Sane On-line

I will never forget the first night we brought Sarah home from the hospital. She was screaming her little head off and then doing this weird gagging thing, like a cat with a hairball. As her face turned purple, we panicked and called the nurse line, and all I could think was, “How in the world am I supposed to keep this little person alive?!”

Parenting teens in the technology age can feel a lot like that.

It’s scary and dangerous and there are so many unknowns. It can be hard to know where to start and even harder to control. We want to protect our children and give them independence at the same time, all without causing World War III in our homes. Is that even possible?

In Part 1 of this series, we covered some things you can do before your teens enter the digital world. Today I want to share some things we have learned as we’ve navigated this challenge with our teen girls over the past few years…

Family, Homeschooling, Little children, Manna, Motherhood ·

Six Ways Parenting is Like Math

I know, I know, some of you are thinking, “There is no way parenting is like math. There is no easy formula to follow, and no variables to plug in that equal a perfect child.”

You’re right.

And some of you are thinking, “Yes! Parenting is hard! Math is hard! I get it!”
And you’re right, too.

So if you’re both right, then what in the world am I talking about?

Just hear me out…

One of the things I love best about homeschooling is watching the light bulb come on when something “clicks” for one of my kids. This phenomenon is not unique to homeschooling- all parents experience this with their children in different ways. Maybe you are helping them with homework, or teaching them how to shoot a basketball, or even teaching them how to talk when they are little. There is something special about that first time they say your name, make a basket, or solve the math problem. Their eyes get big, their face lights up, and something special passes between you. Success! It is an amazing moment to share.

But those moments are rare, like finding a single pearl hidden somewhere among an ocean of oysters. It takes hard work, perseverance, and is often overwhelming. And in my experience, they usually come about the time I have decided to give up.

I find parenting to work much the same way…

Faith, Family, Uncategorized ·

Investing in Teens, Part 3: Ready to Listen

It’s 11:27pm and my bed is calling. I finish brushing my teeth and walk into my bedroom, and then hear footsteps in the hallway. “Hey Momma, do you have a minute?”
Why is it my teens never want to talk when I’m ready to listen? It seems like, without fail, they always approach me at the most inconvenient times!
Oh, that happens to you, too?

As exhausting as parenting can be some days, our time to speak into our teens lives is limited, and we cannot waste it. But before we can speak, we must be intentional about listening, so they know how much we care.

Today I want to share a few ways we can make the most of opportunities to get our kids talking, so we’ll be ready to listen when the time comes.

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